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By Melissa Walsh
"So be sure when you step. Step with care and great tact and remember that Life’s a Great Balancing Act." — Dr. Seuss, Oh, the Places You’ll Go! In this early part of my rookie season as a U8 hockey coach, I’m highly alert to two sets of wisdom: 1- insight into how little kids think; and 2- statements about how respected coaches think. I want to blend that wisdom and package it into how I interact with our Mite hockey players on the ice, on the bench, and in the room. I understand my role as nurturing their love for the game, which is achieved by teaching and motivating. It is the great balancing act of the youth hockey coach. An often repeated Scotty Bowman quote is: “The better the coaching has become, the worse the game has become.” I couldn’t find the original context for this quote on the Internet. But as a mom of four hockey players, I’ll take a stab at this quote’s implication for youth hockey: Nailing the Xs and Os is far less important than evolving a coaching finesse for motivating players, bringing alive their passion for playing the game, and channeling every player’s innate will to win. In his hockey memoir, The Game, Ken Dryden shared in detail his perspective of Scotty Bowman and his style of coaching. He said that Bowman understood his players very well, yet didn’t seek to befriend them. He had a talent for motivating players, getting all of his players to dig deeper. He earned respect and trust from the players. And, according to Dryden, Bowman did not employ systems. Rather he brought to each game “a plan” for “getting the right players on the ice.” What does this imply for those of us coaching the game’s youngest players? If we are to coach Bowman-style, we will know our players. We will treat our child players like children. We will praise them concretely for skating hard and tackling a new skill. We won’t force systems; our practice and game plans will give them room to hone creativity and hockey sense. We will grow their love for the game. We will find a way to develop each kid on the roster, despite the team’s vast range in skill level. How? By enhancing the will to win in every player. During every practice drill, each player should sense his or her potential as an athlete. Practices should be fun, and heads should be sweaty when the helmets come off after practice. And during every shift of every game, each player’s confidence must grow. Effective youth coaches use “mistakes” as teaching moments, not open opportunities to belittle players. I’ve been hearing so much complaining around the rink about USA Hockey’s revised Coaching Education Program and its new rules, which are rooted in LTAD (Long Term Athlete Development) and the ADM (American Development Model). Indeed, USA Hockey’s new approach is forcing significant change and cutting into the agenda of many coaches, most who are far more seasoned in this sport than me. As a hockey mom who has seen up close the good, bad and the ugly of youth hockey, I support and applaud USA Hockey’s LTAD approach. I believe that with its effort to foster each kid’s love for hockey and chance to evolve creativity in playing hockey, USA Hockey is redeeming some of the best aspects of pond hockey and giving the game back to whom it should belong — to the kids. As Don Cherry said, “People think common sense is common, but it’s not.” USA Hockey is forcing common sense on youth hockey coaches. Next, I hope they’ll develop an education program of common sense for our hockey parents.
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By Melissa Walsh
What do hockey moms do on Mother’s Day? They go to the rink of course. With most youth hockey players participating in Spring hockey, hockey- mom duties continue well beyond the arrival of May flowers. At least one of my boys has had a game or tourney each Mother’s Day for the past several years. The first season or two I was somewhat bent out of shape over the situation. “C’mon,” I would protest seeing the Spring schedule. “Can’t we even get Mother’s Day off.” I came to realize that, no, hockey moms do not get Mother’s Day off, but we get used to it. I dare say, we even learn to enjoy being at a rink on our special day. My best hockey-mom Mother’s Day memory happened years ago in Toronto, where my oldest son’s team was participating in a weekend tournament. In the hotel, getting ready for the rink early that Sunday morning, my son announced, “Mom, the coach said there’s a team meeting downstairs.” So I followed my Squirt down to the lobby. One of the coaches directed me and the other moms to a conference room. “Everyone’s in there,” he said. Lo and behold, our little Squirt hockey players had planned a wonderful surprise for the moms. They served us breakfast and gave us flowers. It was certainly more pampering than I would have received at home. Ever since, I don’t complain about having to be at the rink on Mother’s Day. It’s become part of our family’s Mother’s Day tradition. I can’t imagine the holiday without hockey — watching my boys play, catching the NHL playoffs, and then playing in my Sunday night league with my hockey-mom buddies. Mother’s Day doesn’t get any better than that. I’d love to hear about your hockey-mom Mother’s Day memories. Send them to me via Twitter @powerplaywriter or my Facebook page.
By Melissa Walsh
Look around the rink and conduct a little study. Exhibit A: the rookie hockey mom. Exhibit B: the veteran hockey mom. How are they different? I expect you won’t detect differences in how rookie and veteran hockey moms dress, walk, sit, check their smartphones, or hold their coffee mugs. Rather, you’ll spot the delta between rookie and veteran by what comes out of the mouths of hockey moms. From the time a mom enters her rookie season of youth hockey parenting through the finale of watching teens playing midget or junior hockey, the voice of the hockey mom evolves. I’ve discovered that as a mom’s hockey knowledge grows, so do her screams become cheers, her expressions of worry become expressions of hope, her rants become prayers, and her angst becomes faith in the power behind this great game. So what are the differences between the voice of the rookie hockey mom and the voice of the veteran hockey mom? Below are some differences I’ve noticed. First of all, the rookie hockey mom is confused by the ref signals (unless she plays hockey). She can’t distinguish the tripping call from the slashing call, nor the crosscheck call from the interference call. And she thinks that every time a kid crashes or falls, a ref’s arm should go up. Conversely, veteran hockey moms become pretty good officiating analysts of this fast game. They can also see the systems forming, the guy who’s open, how the lines are gelling, and the goal that is about to happen. For instance, if you want to know exactly what went wrong on the backcheck, ask the veteran goalie mom. She’ll break it down for you. Rookie hockey moms don’t have this vision (unless they play hockey). Here are some comparisons of what a rookie hockey mom might say with what a veteran hockey mom might say in similar situations. As her kid begins moving the puck out of his team’s zone, the rookie mom screams, “SKAAAAAAATE!!!!!!” The veteran hockey mom, quietly mutters, “Okay now, set it up.” When her kid’s team is hit with more penalties than the opposing team, the rookie hockey mom comments, “These refs suck.” The veteran hockey mom says, “That’s okay, the hockey gods are fair. It’ll even out in the long run.” When there’s bodychecking, the rookie hockey mom cringes and says, “Ooh, I hate this checking.” Yet the veteran hockey mom acknowledges clean hits with, “Nice hit.” She might even raise her voice from the bleachers to advise, “Hit somebody!” Watching NHL hockey, the rookie hockey mom says, “I don’t get the fighting.” The veteran hockey mom says, “There’s a code.” After a tough loss, the rookie hockey mom says, “I feel sorry for the goalie.” The veteran hockey mom thinks, “I respect the goalie.” Watching HNIC, the rookie hockey mom says, “Don Cherry is nuts.” The veteran hockey mom says, “Don Cherry is prophetic. Nice suit.” Toward the end of the season, the rookie hockey mom says, “I’m so sick of being at the rink.” The veteran hockey mom says, “Let’s tailgate.” Planning the family spring break trip, the rookie hockey mom thinks, “Finally, we’re going to have a week with no hockey.” The veteran hockey mom suggests to the family, “Hey, on our way to Orlando, why don’t we stop off in Nashville to catch a Preds game?” Certainly, what a hockey mom knows and says radically evolves during that wild and bumpy journey that is youth hockey. So, you hockey parents out there, please share what you’ve noticed (tweet @powerplaywriter). What has evolved for you in the way you think and speak about youth hockey?
By Melissa Walsh
For many hockey parents, the pre-ice routine begins with racing home from work to quickly gather the equipment and kids, only to hop right back in the car to head off to the rink. Following the ice-time, it’s racing home again to quickly get the kids in bed. Though you know good nutrition is valuable to youth hockey players, you can’t seem to fit it into the schedule. You may feel that feeding them like the champs they’re striving to become is impossible. However, with a little planning and teaching, you can foster excellent nutritional habits in your players, which they will continue the rest of their lives. According to sports nutrition experts Mitzi Dulan and Dr. Chris Mohr of www.fuellikeachampion.com, proper youth hockey nutrition is quite simple. Just remember three fundamental rules: fuel, hydrate, and recover. FUEL -- Teach your youth players that food is fuel for the body and that winning performance depends on ingesting optimal fuel. But unlike the fancy synthetic fuel required for a race car, a healthy body depends on simple, natural fuel — fruits, vegetables, and whole grains. Stock up on healthy kid-friendly foods, such as berries, grapes, raw carrots, bananas, yogurt, PB&J, oatmeal raison cookies, trail mix, etc. Be vigilant about your kids not skipping breakfast and ensure that they eat healthy carbs one to three hours before hitting the ice. Also, teach them that poor fuel — fried and sugary foods — can deter the body’s performance. HYDRATE -- Explain to your players that optimal performance also depends on a reliable cooling system. Like engine applications, an athlete’s body temperature is regulated with water. It is critical that youth hockey players understand that when they feel thirsty, they are already dehydrated. Therefore, they must learn to schedule fluid intake regularly throughout the day, rather than waiting until they’re thirsty to grab something to drink. Youth athletes should drink fluids a few hours before an event (16 oz), during an event (sips after every shift), and following an event (24 oz). Get them in the habit of carrying something to drink with them all day. If they don’t want to drink water, juice or Gatorade are fine. Exercise caution with energy drinks, ensuring the ingredients do not include caffeine or sugar. RECOVER -- Muscles are strained during athletic activity. Not fueling and re-hydrating the body within two hours following athletic activity will impair muscle recovery. Because youth hockey players’ muscles are growing as well as recovering from the strain of playing hockey, it is especially important to ensure that they are nourished with carbs and fluids within two hours after getting off the ice. Ideally, they should eat a healthy snack and intake fluids within a half hour. While getting proper nutrition is as critical as any other aspect of youth hockey training, keep in mind that youth hockey players are not elite pros who require a sophisticated pre-game carb-loading routine and complicated protein/vitamin-supplement regimen. The key is to teach them the three fundamental rules of fuel, hydrate and recover, then making good foods and fluids available. Because hockey players are superstitious, you may soon have in your household a kid who won’t play a hockey game without first having his peanut butter and banana on whole wheat washed down with an orange Gatorade. If this is the case, you’ve made a great impact as nutritional coach. Practical Tips for the Time-Deprived Hockey Parent
By Melissa Walsh
If it weren’t for religion, chasing a puck around on skates would be meaningless. Anyone deeply involved with the spirited tradition of hockey is familiar with the sport’s rituals, mystics and gods. Hockey certainly stretches your faith. It is a belief system that transcends rules and tactics, driving meaning and purpose into a player’s dedicated vision and a fan’s hopeful zeal. And in hockey’s victories and disappointments, joy and frustration, we — hockey’s matriarchs — choose always to keep the faith in religious hockey. Like saints, memorable hockey players are known for courageous passion and humility. Outsiders don’t know this; they think hockey is a bully’s game. For the hockey player, greatness is a purpose, a mission from God — whom hockey folks refer to with the euphemism “the hockey gods.” Like mysticism, hockey sense can’t be taught, only honed with the help of wise coaching. And the lore and culture of the hockey life are reinforced by hockey moms. Hockey moms who know that 80 percent of the game is the mental part nurture hockey toughness in the home. Hockey toughness is nurtured by hockey moms in Canada, where the mystique of hockey’s past and future are strongly interwoven into its present and whose national history includes remarkable hockey moments, such as Henderson’s goal to seal the national team’s victory against the Soviets in the 1972 Summit Series. Hockey toughness is nurtured by American hockey moms old enough to remember how the hockey game presented a miracle for the United States in 1980 — a blessing that wouldn’t have been realized without the fierce physical training and mental strength of Herb Brooks’ players. Sure, religious hockey forces upon us hockey moms a certain fanaticism. We undertake the religious-hockey instruction of our home. We wear a hockey mom pin close to our heart next to a cross. We teach the kids about the stories of great players, how they controlled the puck for a purpose greater than themselves — for the team and for the fans. We tell them that hockey players don’t act selfishly, don’t disrespect authority and don’t tattle. We adorn the kids’ bedrooms with images of Mr. Hockey, The Rocket, The Great One, The Next One and Mario the Magnificent. We dress them in the jersey’s of hockey’s finest armies and take them on their first pilgrimage to Toronto. We allow them to grow hockey hair. We cooperate with the dervish behavior of our goalies, honoring pre-game rituals and superstitions. We buy the little ones tape in their lucky color and work with team managers to get them their lucky jersey number. I like hockey because if you’re patient and loyal in fighting the good fight, you’ll eventually taste victory. Every hockey insider knows that. And though the hockey gods have been attributed with great disappointments, such as imposing a 54-year-long curse on the powerful city of New York, they’re not despised by the game’s great players and coaches. Rather, “the hockey gods,” or the purity in the momentum of the game, are respected. Mike Babcock said, “The hockey gods are fair. If you don’t play hard, you don’t win.” Occupying hockey’s core then is a faith in a divine justice. It pumps meaning into the tenacious backcheck, the relentless forecheck and the confident attack on net. And for goalies, the hockey game can give them the power to stop time. So to the end of rearing my kids into sainthood, I raise them as hockey players, because in hockey there are no shortcuts. It’s just like life. For its promotion of strong values, development of character and offering of lessons for the trials of real life, I believe in hockey.
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